Infinite Love
You know with a title like that you’ve got me in one of my philosophical moods, don’t you 🙂 Well, get ready for the ride, my readers….
It all started down by the beach this afternoon. I was out walking doggie, totally alone & contemplative on miles of endless sand. The Cape was whipping about in one of her glorious moods and I was loving it all. Wind swept in swirling gusts from the south, the sea was wild with silver froth and the clouds were streaked like the brush of a painter’s canvas across the sky. It was our first day of sun after a few days of rather violent storms and for some reason that made the moment even more beautiful. I was standing in deep absorption of nature’s art when the thought came to be completely unbidden…
“Damn, I’m going to miss this place!”
It was such an odd thought, coming from a nomadic-souled gal after two months of sitting still in one place. Odder still for the fact that I’m actually really looking forward to leaving. How could I be capable of missing a place when so much adventure is in front of me? How could I not be satiated from what I’ve already experienced? Is my nomadic soul gone? Or simply never satisfied?
I sat down in the sand and thought it through. As my eyes swept the horizon I took in the mélange of sensations around me -> the roar of the waves, the feel of the soft sand between my toes, the comfort of the ever-stoic Cape and the smells of the sea. My mind opened to the moment and my heart filled with awe….and there it was…the answer I was looking for
“It’s infinite love, baby….”
It was so darn obvious, and yet so surprising at the same time. The reason I can feel such conflicting emotions is because my heart has no limits. Every place I’ve been in my life, every piece of nature I’ve seen has taken a small portion of my heart and kept it for all eternity. Like the strings of an instrument these pieces lock in place and can be played to the tune of old and familiar memories, arousing the same longing & pleasure that they did when they were first created. They never break and they never stop multiplying, and the only reason they never cease to be is that your love is infinite.
Just like that…
No end, no limits, no finishes. My heart can travel the world and miss the mountains, the deserts, the oceans, the tropics and the sandy beaches of my homeland all at the same time without sadness and without regret. The only barriers are my own mind and my own insecurities. And only by closing my heart would I limit these experiences. I’ve seen this happen to folks too, the closing of the heart. These people lose the ability to find beauty in the moment. They either see the negative in everything or constantly seek to compare to something they knew before
“They have better beaches in {{given spot}} you know….and this annoying wind messes up my hair…and how can you stand the smell of rotting seaweed?”
And the truth is it’s all here…that incessant wind and the rotting seaweed on the beach…but I just don’t really see it. Call me a bleedin’ romantic if you will, but I see something totally different and if these same people were to give themselves a chance, open up their hearts, they might find the ability to see something else too.
So here I am at the beach by myself and now I understand how it is I’m going to miss it. Cape Blanco has taken a piece of my heart and she’s never going to give it back, but that’s quite OK ‘coz I got plenty of love to go around. Quite a deep set of thoughts for a dog walk, but I guess that’s just the kind of gal I am.
Oh yes, Infinite love….
Post Post Note/ Thanks for all the great discussion in my last post on password management. Not only did I learn alot from my readers & commenters, but that same post inspired Technomadia to write their own article on password management which I encourage everyone to read. All good stuff!
I’ve experienced the same feelings, Nina, wanting to stay somewhere and being ready to leave at the same time. It’s so wonderful to know that our hearts can hold it all, and that there’s room for loving so many places and people. One of the most striking things that anyone has ever said to me was, “You have the gift of finding beauty wherever you go.” You too, clearly have this gift. Thanks for sharing it.
True words indeed…and I totally agree. I like to believe I seek & find beauty everywhere I go. At least that’s my hope! It’s definitely gift.
Nina
Sounds like you have Nomadic Love Fever. Wanderlust at it’s best. Permanent Roam Mode. Don’t Stop… I hope I never lose that Energizer Bunny feeling.
Yup, totally got the fever…and sure hope I never, ever lose it!
Nina
That was beautiful and I must say, you expressed my thoughts as well!
Ps…I’m struggling with last pass and using it on my iPhone. Starting to read the manual. I’d rather walk on the beach! Oh, I just did!
Setting-up Lastpass takes a little (initial) doing on the iPhone. You have to toggle “names & passwords” OFF in your general settings & then toggle Lastpass ON in Safari. Then, it works like a charm. This is the article to read:
https://lastpass.com/support.php?cmd=showfaq&id=2423
Nina
Remarkable and spot-on thoughts. One of things I’m trying to teach my grandkids is to avoid dichotomous thinking – just because they like one thing better than the other doesn’t mean they don’t like the other. Our capacity to experience is infinite and infinite leaves plenty of room.
And thanks for the lighthouse tour last week.
So right on and a great lesson to pass on. Glad you made it to see us at the lighthouse for a tour. It’s always fun to meet up with folks who read the blog.
Nina
Oh my, oh my… Is it possible to take words out of ones mouth…really? After months and months of waiting somewhat patiently, we are FINALLY, a month into our DREAM JOURNEY! I feel as though those words were truly coming from my own heart. Although, we are on opposite corners of the US, those words sprouted from my heart in the same infinite love of all that surrounds me… Is it possible to become one with the nature we adore? I think so …in appreciation and adoration of EVERY single nuance which makes up our beloved. (Oh doth we wax poetic).. But who would not when we are privy to such beauty!! Write (right) on!
Beautiful words and I am right there with you!
Nina
So beautifully said! I completely agree. I find beauty in almost every moment and that is what makes life so abundant and amazing. I really enjoyed your posting. Laura
We feel exactly the same way 🙂
Nina
what a deep insight/experience.I;m glad I follow your blog!
Heavy and deep. Food for thought for a long time!
You have so eloquently explained something I’ve struggled to understand for the past 28 months. I too have such strong mixed emotions when we leave a place we’ve called home for a while. Thank you for expressing feelings I completely understand because I’ve had them myself! It’s all good!
You know I’ve often wondered if I “feel” too much. Is that possible? But the concept of infinite love makes it all clear. Happy I could bring that same clarity to you too 🙂 travel on!
Nina
Bah! I must be one of those dreaded closed-hearted folks, because the instant I saw the title “Infinite Love”, I started humming the 80s song “Tainted Love”! Do you suppose a visit to Cape Blanco might cure this?
Hey, “tainted love” is a damn fine song and a worthy accompaniment to the post. I say come to Cape Blanco, blast the song and do both!
Nina
Our hearts have an infinite supply of love to go around… if only our clocks had an infinite supply of time to go along with it.
Nomadism speaks to my poly heart in so many ways, that you have so eloquently expressed here. Thank you, dear.
Beautifully said, my dear!
Nina
Interesting….I’m pretty sure I’m not the only one to do this but….I entered a 9 lower case name and cane up with a 22 minute crack. Added a dash after the 4th letter and went to 32 days. Then added only a back slash after the 6th letter and it jumped to 287 years. Didn’t go any farther than that but can see it doesn’t take a whole lot to make a big difference.
Yup, I played around with length/characters too. It’s fun to see how quickly a few small extras can add to the password strength.
Nina
“No end, no limits, no finishes. My heart can travel the world and miss the mountains, the deserts, the oceans, the tropics and the sandy beaches of my homeland all at the same time without sadness and without regret. The only barriers are my own mind and my own insecurities. And only by closing my heart would I limit these experiences.”
You are so much better with words than I am. And thank you for that. Put into words in a way I’ve not quite found to describe my feelings. Absolutely awesome! Thanks again. 🙂
I’m so happy I could express something that you’ve felt yourself. That’s always my goal -> to try to put into words my feelings & hopefully have those same words “speak” to others.
Nina
Your words have spoken to me, and for me. Gotta respect that! 🙂
Lovely post Nina!
Loved your post, and so agree. After being a military wife for years, and living many places, I get itchy feet after being in one spot for a while, but also think of every place I have lived with a longing like homesickness, for the experiences and physical attributes of each place. I think the best experiences in life have a bit of the sad to go along with the joy. Places change, kids grow up, and we move on!
Interesting note about the sad and the joy. I guess the richest experiences do have a little of both. I’ll have to ponder this one a bit more. Good food for thought!
Nina
To me it is not Your love that is infinite … but rather, he that created it all…. and yes, his is, in actual fact, infinite….
Another beautiful way to put it.
Nina
Awwww I have the same feeling about the OR coast and it always draws me back but doesn’t keep me from other places either.
The OR coast always draws us back too. I love to go other places, but perhaps Oregon has a “little” bigger part of my heart 🙂
Nina
you are an old soul reconnecting with yourself and your universe. subtle energies are to be relished when we can slow down enough to reconnect. excellent job!!
Old souls…yes…I’ve always felt like an old soul. I like the idea of reconnecting as we slow down. I don’t always manage to do it, but when I do (like this day) it’s quite an amazing experience.
Nina
I have never read anything so profound and what so perfectly explains and describes my own “nomadic soul”. Thank you for giving words to who I am!
From one nomadic soul to another…glad it “spoke” to you 🙂
Nina
beautiful piece of writing! Thanks for sharing your love of Cape Blanco. Can’t wait to get there next summer…
Oh I DO hope you love it as much as we do. Be prepared for the weather, and embrace it all. This is a magical place.
Nina
Wow … wonder what you had for breakfast 🙂
Eggs and bacon…the magical combination 🙂
Nina
Beautifully expressed, Nina.
I have felt that way,too, but never took the time to ride the feeling and figure it out.
So – thank you. I love your wanderings!
Very happy you’re along for the ride 🙂
Nina
When I started the post, the neighbor started up the leaf blower. So I closed it until they were quiet, as I knew from the title it would be worthy of a peaceful space. And truly it is. Knowing the capacity of the heart is unlimited is such a gift – and living a life with unlimited elements to fill it with is a blessing. Your words are a lovely reminder that the choice is ours :-).
Beautifully said 🙂
Nina
When I started reading, the song ‘Should I Stay Or Should I Go’ jumped into my head. Now ‘Tainted Love’ is stuck there. LOL
Brilliant today, Nina!
The Sex Pistols! Another outstanding band that takes me back to my punk rock days. Still know all the words by heart.
Nina
The version I remember (and still occasionally listen to) is by The Clash. For what it’s worth. 🙂
DUH! Total mind block. Yes, The Clash. I totally knew that too! I was thinking of the album “London Calling” and for some reason just had a mind fart on the group. argh!!
Nina
P.S. Silly name mix-ups like this are not uncommon for me 🙂
Masterpieces — your inspired writing and this lovely earth we share.
Grace (in Tucson)
Why thank you {{blush}}
Nina
Loved what you expressed here, and amazingly just after reading it I came across this quote in a book I am reading and thought it mirrored your thoughts perfectly: “No matter where life takes you, the place where you stand is holy ground. Love hard and love wide and love long, and you will find the goodness in it”. {from Lisette’s List by Susan Vreeland}
What a wonderful quote! Thanks so much for sharing it!
Nina
Hear! Hear! (Getting a lot of mileage out of your pics…!)
Glad to hear it Pete!
Nina
Your gorgeous photographs go absolutely perfectly with this soulful piece of writing. Wnderlust is the name I’ve always used for my constant desire to see the next spot but my sadness at leaving this one that is so spectacular. Staying long enough to fully experience those feelings of love is a wonderful gift to give yourself.
Wunderlust is a great way to describe it. Reading your blog I can certainly feel those same yens in your writing.
Nina
I think a lot of it is about expectations, to drop the judging and just see what is. The seaweed is rotting, as an observation, not a judgment. Moments when the heart and mind open to just quietly be, awareness of senses and stimuli. These are always special as they rarely occur these days.
Dropping expectations is definitely a huge part of getting to this feeling of love. It’s not always easy to do, but it’s something I too try to practice consistently.
Nina
Looks like your planned move from Millenicom to Verizon later this month won’t be voluntary. Can’t wait to hear your thoughts!
Yup, the Millenicom announcement was a total surprise! Looks like we’re becoming Verizon customers no matter what now. Since we were planning to upgrade to 40GB anyway, it’s not a huge impact for us, but for those who want to stick with a smaller bucket this could mean some big price increases. It all depends what Verizon decides to do with the accounts. No news either way at the point.
Nina
Your post reminds me a little of an old bluegrass tune by Dan Hicks and His Hot Licks, “How Can I Miss You If You Won’t Go Away?”…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rW9-FOLG-iA <– a YouTube video. I get stuck in one place too long and start thinking about settling down, all while I'm itching to see what's over the next hill and around the next bend. We're an ornery, contrarian bunch, humans.
LOL I like that…we’re an ornery, contrarian bunch. Yes, I like that alot 🙂
Nina
Been following your blog for quite awhile and appreciate the work you invest in it. DW and her sister took your lighthouse tour yesterday while I am still slaving away in the salt mines for a few more months.When she gets home your suggestion of Last Pass will be installed. Thank You
I remember them both well! We had a light day at the lighthouse yesterday so we were able to spend a little more time with each visitor. They caught us right at shift change. Glad they could make it!
Nina
I totally understand where you are coming from as you write this piece. I have felt this was about so many places…how can we leave but I want to move on. I guess that is what drives those of us that move more frequently as compared to staying put for months and months.
You definitely have the same bug Pam, no doubt.
Nina
Two articles you might find interesting.
9 of the Best CA Desert Winter CGs:
http://www.kcet.org/living/travel/socal_wanderer/camping/winter-campsites-in-the-desert.html
and 7 Best Places to Stargaze:
http://www.kcet.org/living/travel/socal_wanderer/night-sky/stargazing/7-prime-places-for-stargazing-in-the-low-desert.html
Happy Trails!!
Fun articles, thanks!
Nina
Being open to the the experience of a place and and able to allow it to show you its beauty is a gift. As is gratitude. And letting that place go but keeping it with you. You have these gifts. Thanks for sharing this lovely post.
P.S. I too have philosophical thoughts while walking doggie.
Brenda
I’m glad to know I’m not the only one LOL. Actually the vast majority of philosophical thoughts I’ve had have happened while walking/hiking. AND the vast majority of the big life decisions Paul & I have made have happened the same way. We do our best thinking while we hike…and having doggie along is just a bonus 🙂
Nina
You nailed it, Nina. Thanks for putting something hard to express into words! I really hope our paths cross again sometime.
So beautifully said Nina. I believe that gratitude has much to do with the thoughts you so eloquently expressed Nina. You paired your images with your words perfectly! 🙂
I agree being open and accepting is the key……of which both you do so well?.beautiful post Nina, just beautiful…..